Hebrews 4:12-13 "For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. 13 And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account."

All articles are written using the NKJV, unless otherwise noted! All articles are written by David Hicks, unless specified otherwise.

Will You Marry Me?”

Part VI

How much do you know about marriage?

In observance of humanity, I am persuaded to believe that too many know too little about this subject. I invite you to study this very important theme as God has instructed and instituted this union.

The need is obvious. It is obvious by the fact that two out of three marriages end in divorce today (a stat that has even found its way into the “Body of Christ”). It is obvious by the advice given by marriage counselors, preachers, in-laws, lawyers, advice columnists, and by this entire like. It is obvious by the attitude of many of our civil authorities, Senators, representatives, and so on. It is obvious by the teaching that our children are exposed to in our public schools.

It is interesting to note that none of the above, including most preachers, refer to God’s word in dealing with marital problems, or even teaching in advance the understanding of marriage as God has revealed it. God’s word affirms that there is not a problem that a husband or wife may have that God doesn’t answer.

The key is: APPLICATION!!!

Before we actually begin with the wife’s responsibilities in the marriage relationship, there are a few things that we need to understand about the role of the woman.

As all of us are well aware, we live in a day and age in which there is much ado about how abused the woman is. Women are being led to believe that men have reduced them to a foot scraper. She is being bombarded with influences that state she is equal to men and in some cases superior to men. There is a little truth in these points, especially when it comes to capability, but they are little truths that are not understood.

Some men have reduced some women to a very low degree, in contrast to the training God’s word speaks about and we have studied in the previous lessons. This is magnified by men not knowing their place in God’s scheme for marriage, and women not knowing their place, and allowing men to mistreat, or misuse them. God made the women to be a compatible companion, a helper for the man.

In her place in God’s home and so far as her responsibilities are concerned, she is equal to man. In her place in God’s home specifically, she is superior to man. God gave her purposes that man cannot perform, and in those things she is superior to man.

In areas of emotion, she is superior to men. A man cannot hold a candle to her tenderness. He cannot come anywhere near expressing the love that only a mother can express for her children. It cannot be denied that in many areas she is superior to man!

The shame of the modern doctrines that promote in a militant style that women must reject their superiority, as given, and strive to find superiority in realms not meant for them by their Creator, sadly takes away what is solely their purview, beauty, and competence. In these areas where she was not meant to be superior, even God calls her the “weaker vessel”; whereby God expresses a difference in equality.

1 Peter 3:7Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.”


Since the responsibilities of man and women in the marriage relationship are different and one cannot completely fulfill those of the other; the man and woman are not equal.

This has nothing to do with women in the workforce and in fact if a woman is hired to do the same work that a man does, there should be no difference in the amount they are compensated.

In a separate issue, we should also note that there are different kinds of women; there are virtuous women (morally excellent), and those who are not virtuous. Let’s look into some instruction in defining these types of women, by God’s word:

Proverbs 12:4An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones.”

Proverbs 18:22He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the Lord.”

Proverbs 31:10Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.”

1 Peter 3:1-6Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. 3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— 4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. 5 For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.”

These statements serve to show what God thinks of a good woman and their true value, as well as what every woman and girl should strive to attain. Look now at the other side of the coin:

Proverbs 9:13A foolish woman is clamorous; She is simple, and knows nothing.”

Proverbs 11:22As a ring of gold in a swine’s snout, So is a lovely woman who lacks discretion.”

Proverbs 21:19Better to dwell in the wilderness, Than with a contentious and angry woman.”

Proverbs 23:27-28For a harlot is a deep pit, And a seductress is a narrow well. 28 She also lies in wait as for a victim, And increases the unfaithful among men.”

Proverbs 27:15A continual dripping on a very rainy day And a contentious woman are alike”

In summary of these points; there is nothing more destructive than a bad woman, and nothing more constructive than a good woman. Now with these thoughts in mind, we can progress on to examine some of the woman’s responsibilities in marriage.

Submission -

In God’s rebuke of Eve;

Genesis 3:16To the woman He said: “I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; In pain you shall bring forth children; Your desire shall be for your husband, And he shall rule over you.””


He would enforce that her desire would be to her husband, and that he would rule over her. This simply means that she was to be in submission to him, he being her head. Not only is the wife taught to be in submission to her husband, she is also taught to what extent she is to submit to her husband; “as to the Lord”.

The wife is not to submit to her husband if he demands of her something that is contrary to the doctrine of Christ. By the same token, he is also engaging in activity that is contrary to the will of God when he asks her something that is against God’s will.

An understanding of this point will forever do away with the wife trying to be the head of her husband. She must realize that in the Lord, he is her head, her overseer, her guide, her leader, and respond accordingly.

There is nothing more detrimental than a wife who bosses her husband as though he doesn’t know first thing about his responsibilities. This is seen when the bride of Christ; likewise commands the head instead of being submissive to His preeminence; the result is apostasy.

Parents, we must teach our sons to be godly men and our daughters to be godly women, in order for them to be joined in pure harmony. This can only be done when we are practicing what God teaches; Husbands to be the heads of the relationship and home, loving his wife as himself. Wives in submission and joined with their own husbands in completing what God has charged them to complete.


Next: “The Woman’s Responsibility in Love!”