Hebrews 4:12-13 "For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. 13 And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account."

All articles are written using the NKJV, unless otherwise noted! All articles are written by David Hicks, unless specified otherwise.

Will You Marry Me?”

Part VII

How much do you know about marriage?

In observance of humanity, I am persuaded to believe that too many know too little about this subject. I invite you to study this very important theme as God has instructed and instituted this union.

The need is obvious. It is obvious by the fact that two out of three marriages end in divorce today (a stat that has even found its way into the “Body of Christ”). It is obvious by the advice given by marriage counselors, preachers, in-laws, lawyers, advice columnists, and by this entire like. It is obvious by the attitude of many of our civil authorities, Senators, representatives, and so on. It is obvious by the teaching that our children are exposed to in our public schools.

It is interesting to note that none of the above, including most preachers, refer to God’s word in dealing with marital problems, or even teaching in advance the understanding of marriage as God has revealed it. God’s word affirms that there is not a problem that a husband or wife may have that God doesn’t answer.

The key is: APPLICATION!!!

In lesson six, we learned that God values highly, a good woman and commends such to men in order to complete them. We also illustrated that God made the woman to be in subjection to her husband and what that practically looks like. Now we want to continue with yet another responsibility of the wife to her husband.

Respect Her Husband -

Ephesians 5:33Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

This is a double barreled statement in that it hits both the husband and the wife with specific responsibilities. Due to the fact that we have already studied the husband’s responsibility to love his wife, we want to devote our attention to the responsibility of the wife to “Respect her husband”.

For the husband to be able to love his wife as himself, the wife cannot be unlovely, nor can she demand affection where it is undeserved. For the husband to love his wife above any earthly anything, she should manifest such a spirit as would make that possible.

A wife can easily alienate the affections of her partner (this goes both ways as we have already spent time on the husbands side of this); if she is of an irritable and of a faultfinding disposition, if none of his ways please her, if she has no interest in his plans. This rift can continue to grow if she forsakes the home, if she seeks happiness elsewhere. She cannot respect her husband if she is predisposed to never greeting her mate with a smile, if she is wasteful of their earnings, etc…  

This kind of rift is damaging in any relationship where team work is vital to harmonic success. These notations are vital in the process of selection before oaths are exchanged in order to make sure through the vetting process that compatible priorities to God’s purposes can be met.

If on the other hand, the wife can manifest God’s mandated responsibilities to her husband, there would never be any reason to withhold his complete affection to his wife in fulfillment of her needs. To honor, respect, and join forces with her husband is to create an unbreakable bond that can accomplish any purpose in a godly home (the husband has been given the responsibility to form the godly foundations of his home and together with his help-meet, they are accomplished).

The greatest tool at her disposal in the accomplishments of her responsibilities can be found in devotion to love; God first, and then to her husband.

Help Meet –

In Genesis 2:18; the New King James uses the term “helper”, and although accurate, I have always been very fond of the original King James in this passage and the term “Help Meet”.

In everything we have discussed thus far, we can clearly see that man could not complete his God given family responsibilities without his perfect mate, match, and help meet (as she literally helps him meet his godly goals).

The man has never lived that could provide a better, a more qualified companion, partner, or helper than the woman (God’s wisdom). In every area of man’s life, the woman is equipped to be his companion. Note the Apostle Paul’s words:

1 Corinthians 11:9Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man.”

This is a fact that must be learned and taught in order for the family to succeed today and in the future. It is a great honor to be partners in this God given foundation of the home and it is exactly in each ones capacity in the goal that we are here for in gender. The wife has the great honor helping her husband be the kind of husband that God would have him be, by being the kind of help-meet God made you to be.

This is the definition of the word loyalty. To be a proper help-meet you must be loyal to your husband. Your loyalty to him will keep him from straying, from seeking interests elsewhere, and or failing to give you the love that enables you to grow in joy towards God.

Your loyalty will make you and the home the most prized possessions he knows on this earth.

Titus 2:4-5that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.”

As Paul would command Titus to “speak things which are proper for sound doctrine” – Titus 2:1; he noted that the wife, being not only loyal, but trustworthy in all things in the home and to God, would allow him to meet this:

Titus 2:6-8Likewise, exhort the young men to be sober-minded, 7 in all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works; in doctrine showing integrity, reverence, incorruptibility, 8 sound speech that cannot be condemned, that one who is an opponent may be ashamed, having nothing evil to say of you.”

Helping him meet his godly goals!!!

Each of the harmonic companions must take the lead in their perspective responsibilities to God and each other in order to be complete as God has designed. Every man needs a woman who can join him in these vastly important responsibilities which in turn make for each of them a far more fulfilling life and service to God. Imagine how much better the home would be for children who are raised with parents joined in support of each other to learn true function, versus the chaotic dysfunction that most families know. The success found in the family would translate to an improved social morality, and a greater service to God.

In the next lesson, we will go deeper into Paul’s instruction to Titus concerning the woman’s role in helping her husband.